University of Sussex Students' Newspaper

Moan Zone – Low Spirits: Pint of no return

The Badger

ByThe Badger

Oct 20, 2012

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Lucy Hartland

This week I was subjected to discrimination against those suffering from the  after-effects of a night mainly fuelled by Vodka.

When the bus eventually decided to arrive and when I took up my half-a seat which the woman next to me had so kindly decided to take up with her rear end and her bag, I had to listen to a screaming toddler throwing a tantrum which so generously maximised my headache.

Adding to my frustration, the bus driver must have misread all the speed limit signs as he decided to crawl down the Lewes road at about 3mph!

Finally I made it to university and bursting for the loo I popped to the library toilets which have a worse odour than dead old skunk.

Would it kill the girls of Sussex (who clearly have no class judging by the state they leave the toilets in) to flush the chain after they empty their bowels?

After making it out of the cubicle alive from the stench, I washed my hands, only to find that there was a queue for the one working hand dryer and no paper towels in the entire room.

I think I might try a better hangover cure next week!!!


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