These sweeping stereotypes and generalisations are of course all in good jest, yet remain equally ridiculous.
On the bus recently I overheard a student tell another, “I’ve heard they have no showers in East Slope” to which the fellow student insightfully replied, “oh man that’s awful”.
This epitomises the preposterous presupposing that’s going on. Albeit a little shabby, to suggest and believe East Slopeans would sacrifice such fundamental levels of hygiene is slightly overboard and downright shocking.
Equally ludicrous, in conversation on the way home from Northfield a few nights ago a Park Village ruffian exclaimed “They were drinking wine from goblets, the posh bastards”. A glass of wine does not constitute being a Duke in Victorian England, the last time I checked.
The social hierarchy that exists among us on campus is a brilliantly absurd concept.
One is only left to speculate and fear the worst; that the class struggle will eventually escalate into violence.
The streets will run red with revolution as East Slopeans on fox-back rise against Northfielders, themselves led by Marcus the Peacock into civil war. That undoubtedly will be the downfall of us all.