Results Roundup

2-1 win for the Hockey Women!

Massive win for the Men’s Rugby Team! 14-12

Sussex’s Badminton Women win!

Sussex’s Lacrosse Team lost 18-4 to Brighton.

Brighton triumphed at swimming 147 – 72

Big win for Sussex uni in volleyball, 3-1!

Huge win for Sussex Women’s Rugby team!

Trampolining help Brighton ‘jump’ into the lead! – Poor banter courtesy of the Brighton SU Twitter feed.

The Women’s Football Team were losing 1-0 when I left to write this but hopefully they’ve pulled it back.


Key Quotes

“Your Dad works for my Dad!”

“We pay your welfare bill”

“I should have known the guy wasn’t Under 18 when he went to greet his kids at halftime”

“All I’ve drunk is beer since 3pm yesterday”

Football Report

The rich amber sun illuminated the grass. Birdsong echoed across the vast expanse of nature, and a cooling breeze tickled the tips of inquisitive worms. The environment incubated the hopes and dreams of a million minuscule insects, buzzing and hovering as they dipped and dived among the green. Mother Earth was finally at peace with her children. It seemed nothing could spoil the luscious calm which had descended upon Brighton’s Falmer Campus. Serenity enveloped the area like a warm glove, quiet and calm, relaxing and pensive, until-


The ferocious cry shattered the peace with enough impact to rouse the county.

Budweisers cracked open. Two litre bottles of Strongbow disappeared in the blink of an eye.

Varsity 2016 had begun.

I arrived just in time for the Men’s football, approaching midday, after taking a dramatic wrong turn and walking parallel with the train line halfway to Moulsecoomb.

The carnival-esque atmosphere should have inspired a quality contest, yet a bumpy pitch and rivalry nerves got the better of both sides, and a combination of poor passes and rugged tackles ensured the ball remained locked in midfield for most of the first half.

This didn’t deter the buoyant supporters, who were content to sip on their beverage of choice in the warming spring sunshine and catch up on everything from module marks to after-party plans. (Consensus: Drink more)

The second half proved slightly more enthralling, with a hatful of chances going wide for both sides.

Yet pandemonium was on the horizon as Sussex won a corner.

A teasing cross was floated into the box, Brighton’s defenders stood still, and Club President Connor Bullen was there to power a bullet header into the top corner and sent the away fans into raptures.

Barriers were pushed aside as the jubilant Sussex supporters charged onto the pitch to embrace the team, Fosters soaking the bemused security guards and fans in equal measure.

Play resumed after a lengthy clear up effort, dictated by the less than impressed referee, and Sussex switched to 5-4-1 in an attempt to hold onto the slender lead.

Yet it was not to be, and Brighton grabbed their equaliser from a similar situation. A flicked on corner was rifled home at the back post, and another pitch invasion broke out, much to the referee’s dismay.

The final whistle blew after little more action, and confusion swept through the fans and players as a penalty shootout was debated, agreed upon, and then postponed due to time constraints.

A tense match therefore ended in a fair draw, with the points shared between Sussex and Brighton.

Glenn Houlihan

Categories: News

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